A mental health advocate has shared how his dad abused his mother and all the times he wished she left him.
The 39-year-old man took to Facebook to write: “I wish someone could tell my mother, her husband will not love her any day soon. He’s not changing for her, neither for his children.
“When he kicked her in the stomach and she was sick was the day she ought to leave, but she didn’t.
“When he threw her clothes off the balcony of their second floor house in 1998 in full public glare was the day she ought to have left, but she didn’t.
“When he conned her off her NSSF money during COVID was the time she would have left him, but she didn’t.
“When he pulled her hair on the carpet until her hairline began to bleed was certainly the best evidence he hated her, but she stayed.
“When he abused her mother that night they were arguing, I thought was the cue, but that too did not startle her enough.
“When he strangled her at 5am forcing himself into controlling the family business threatening to unalive her was certainly the time to flee, no? No.
“When he burnt my hand as a 10 year old with paraffin and a match stick you’d think was a sign enough he’d be a danger to her children, but that too was not enough to ditch the marriage.
“The marriage was more important than her own safety and that of her children.
“When he attempted to gouge her eyes out and I insisted she file a police report, she was hesitant. She did not want him to get in trouble.
“When he’d throw me to the wall like a fly and stomp his foot on my head in the name of administering discipline, no alarm bells rang that it was time to go.
“When he took a loan and she was the guarantor supposedly to complete the house in Ugenya but ended up squandering the money on his lovers, her trust in him miraculously stood the test of time. Instead, she took another loan to cover his shame, completed the house by herself and is now repaying that loan alone.
“When he humiliated her in her own office before her employees, the man still earned his place beside her in their matrimonial bed.
“When he promised to pay our sister’s rent while she was in campus and chip in with fees, he went quiet but kept asking his side chic which business he’d like him to open for her. Sending her nudes in Gen X postures on the screen.
“He even slept with her employee who gave birth to his child.
“I wish I could tell my mother that that man she calls a husband hates her and her children.
“There is no amount of convincing that would bring us back home if she continues choosing him. He should be in jail. He’s a conman, a thief, an abuser and a liar.
“But she insists, “he’s still your father. It doesn’t matter what he has done. He’s still your father.”
“Surely, it’s not that bad, is it?”
ConsultingA Family Law Attorney
