A man who lost his mother has sparked a conversation online after sharing a list given to him by his village group which he must provide.
He revealed that he met with three groups in his village – the men of the kindred, the women of the kindred, and the women married into the kindred. He added that the meeting was to discuss the burial and, just for the discussion to take place, each group had their requirements.
He then shared the list one of the groups gave them.
The list included items that must be provided for the group. These items were mostly food items for the refreshment of members of the group.
The items on the list angered social media users who questioned why a bereaved family should be placed under so much financial pressure before burying their loved one.
Emeka Nobis, who lost his mother after a cancer battle that cost the family millions of Naira, shared the list on Facebook and called for the modification of traditions that don’t serve us.
He wrote: ‘Today, we went again to my mum’s village – my brother and I. The first visit is what is called “Mbete Akwa.” It means to cry about the bereaved. The second visit is called “Okwu Ozu.” It means conversations concerning the dead.
‘Today, we met with three sets of people.
– the umunna (men of the kindred)
– the umuada (women of the kindred)
– the alurudi (women married into the kindred)
‘Each of these groups have their demands. We got the demands of the first two sets on our first visit. Today, we got the list of demands from the third set.
‘Since my mum died at 71, she’s deemed to be in the topmost category of deaths. A cow has been demanded.
‘Thankfully, with wisdom, we’ve been having meaningful conversations concerning these demands. I’ve kept my cool with a smiley face, navigating these conversations.
‘Why am I documenting these things?
‘Firstly, to share my experiences concerning burial in the part of Igboland I come from. I deem certain rituals involved in burials as totally unnecessary and I still maintain my stand. By experiencing it firsthand, I’m now knee-deep into it to see the import firsthand.
‘Secondly, to prepare the hearts of any who will walk this path. It’s project management that requires emotional intelligence to navigate.
‘Thirdly, culture can be modified. It’s left to us to challenge these practices as years go by. I’m pretty sure that it definitely will happen.’
