Media personality Do2dtun has weighed in on the burial controversy of late singer Toluwanisings.
In a series of posts on his social media page, he said burying the dead in a residential area is an archaic and primītive method of burial.
He explained that waking up to a grave most of the time will increase anxiety and unending thoughts. He questioned if the singer would have been rented in the house if he had rented it.
Do2dtun noted that the singer touched lives with his music, and that his attitude toward death is productive to what he stood for.
“If a person you love dies, the peace they need is the peace you project to his family, friends and well-wishers in his absence. The energy you all are exerting can’t bring back the dead, so why dont you channel it into respecting the dead and protecting his legacy. The person you’re fighting for will eventually become dust. All you have is the legacy & memory. Protect that, not ruin it.
Toluwanisings touched lives with his music. The attitude toward his death right now is counterproductive to what he stood for. The family need to be the bigger person here. I am sure he would have said, “Anything my wife says”, if he were here, and even if that’s not the case, in the hierarchy of rights, she holds the right over anyone. Yes, the family can suggest, but the partner holds the right, even his kids, before any family member.
Burying the dead in a residential area is an archaic and prīmitive method of burial. Waking up to a grave most times will increase anxiety, unending thoughts and yes, maybe closer to what you lost, but to what end? If the house was rented, will you bury him there? What is the value, spiritual or moral
standpoint of burying someone in their house? As for me, none, except if it’s their wish.
A life partner hurts differently.
The consequences of any decision affect the person you share a union of that sort with even more. The absence will be felt differently. Family members need to understand that when you give a child out for marriage, the responsibility and decisions lie with the person you handed them over to most of the time. The father might have a right over their child, but it’s not equal to that of the wife or husband. In the hierarchy, your partner comes first after God.
Our traditions and culture have been mixed with entitlement. So much that someone believes, according to their beliefs, they have a certain right assigned to them over what’s logical. We forget our place in decision-making and decide what comes first based on emotions or entitled rights. Some people think they have the right to decide where a child is buried but forget it only matters in agreement with the partner’s decision or the children’s. It’s after they decide that you have a say.
Wisdom is profitable to apply in cases like this. The wife and kids have a right to property over anyone else. They are a priority over anybody. The truth is bitter.
In a case where there is no will, the Partner is automatically entitled to what happens to the property over the family. Most of you give your kids out and forget the consequences of your actions. You love your child, but in extreme cases like this, the mantle is not yours to decide unless a partner allows you.
This is not anyone’s decision; it’s the partner’s. This thing we do is an archaic, prīmitive manner of respecting the dead. This man ends as dust, never to be seen again. It’s Africans that bury the dead in a residential area. If the house was rented, would you bury him there? These are the issues. We are culturally warped; hence, it has eaten so deep that we forget to be logical”.
