A Canada-based Nigerian woman, Ada, has spoken out after people questioned her decision to leave her marriage with four children and solely raise them.
In a Facebook post on Sunday, December 21, 2025, the mother of four noted that since she left her marriage people have been telling her that she should have left the children behind while others advised her to send them to their father in Nigeria.
She alleged that all efforts to make her estranged husband take responsibility for their children have failed, claiming that he never responded to her letters seeking financial support.
However, she stressed that leaving her children with their father is not an option for her because she left the marriage to “protect them.”
“January 4th makes it one full year since I left my marriage with my children,” she wrote.
And ever since, people keep saying: “You shouldn’t be taking care of those kids alone.”
“Their father should be providing.”
“Why didn’t you leave them with him?”
“Why don’t you send them back to Nigeria?”
Let’s remove one thing immediately: leaving my children with their father is not an option. So let’s scrap that.
Yes, their father should be providing. I agree.
That’s why I wrote him a letter asking for financial support.
He read it. He ignored it. He said nothing. His family said nothing. Till today, silence.
So now I want to genuinely ask those who keep talking:
Since I “shouldn’t carry the burden alone,” what exactly should I do?
Drop my children on the main road and go and live my life?
Hand them over to someone who has chosen to be absent?
Return them to a situation I left to protect them?
People talk like single parenting is a choice I woke up and made for fun. As if I didn’t first try communication. As if responsibility can be forced on a man who has decided to be mute.
This is a sincere question: How do you make a man who has chosen to be a deadbeat suddenly become involved in his children’s lives?
Because from where I’m standing, I didn’t choose to do this alone. I was left with no other safe option.
And until someone gives me a realistic answer, I will continue choosing my children over people’s opinions.
It’s 4 days to Christmas and I decided to scream out hopefully I get help.
