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Newsunplug > Blog > Lifestyle > 8 reasons why marriage is not for lovers but for grown adults
Lifestyle

8 reasons why marriage is not for lovers but for grown adults

Godson
Last updated: January 22, 2026 12:04 pm
Godson
Published: January 22, 2026
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Many Kenyan millennials and Gen Z get into marriage because they are deeply in love; marriage is often sold as a beautiful love story filled with romance and happy moments.

The truth is, marriage is not for lovers, but it is for forgivers, sacrificers, and emotionally grown adults. Love may bring two people together, but it is not what sustains a marriage.

Marriage requires daily effort, patience, and maturity. It is about choosing each other even on difficult days, forgiving mistakes, and taking responsibility for the relationship. No amount of romantic feelings can replace the commitment, sacrifices, and emotional strength needed to build a lasting partnership.

Nobody prepares the younger generation for the emotional weight of marriage and responsibility.

A couple holding hands. Image used for illustration. PHOTO/Pexels
A couple holding hands. Image used for illustration. PHOTO/Pexels

Here are eight reasons why marriage is for grown adults, not just for two people who are deeply in love.

  • Marriage requires forgiveness

In marriage, people will hurt each other, intentionally or not. Without forgiveness, resentment grows. Love alone cannot survive bitterness.

  • Feelings are not permanent

Many young couples are not aware that feelings change.

Some days you feel deeply in love, other days you do not. Marriage survives on commitment, not emotions.

  • Responsibility comes before romance

Bills, children, health, family, and stress become part of daily life. Marriage demands responsibility long after the excitement fades.

A well-designed graphic with the word love. PHOTO/Pexels
A well-designed graphic with the word love. PHOTO/Pexels
  • Sacrifice is inevitable

Marriage requires giving up comfort, ego, and sometimes personal dreams for the sake of the union. Lovers want happiness; grown adults choose sacrifice.

  • Communication is important

Marriage needs constant communication, patience, and understanding. Silence, pride, and assumptions slowly destroy relationships.

  • Maturity sustains the union

When problems arise, immature people run away, but grown adults sit down, talk, and find solutions even when it is uncomfortable.

  • Marriage is a daily choice

Marriage is not sustained by wedding vows alone. It survives because two people choose each other every single day.

  • Emotional weight in marriage

Society sells romance but forgets to mention emotional labour and responsibilities.

Marriage comes with stress, disappointment, and pressure that only mature minds can handle.

Marriage is not about butterflies and feelings. It is about patience, forgiveness, maturity, and daily effort. Lovers fall in love, but grown adults stay married.

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